Monday, November 8, 2010

Like air without oxygen

I do not understand.
I really do not understand.
I want to understand.
I really want to understand.
I don't know what I did.
I really don't know what I did.
I am so incredibly sorry about that.
I really am so incredibly sorry about that.
I want one thing to be clear to you.
I want one thing to really be clear to you.
I don't want to live a life without you.
I really don't want to live a life without you.
I love you.
I really love you.

I just wish that you wanted to be my friend.

Why?
Why do I always get the blame?
Please tell me why!

When you were gone I poured petrol in your bed. The bed we shared over the years. I poured it on all your photos. Your books. Your clothes. All that somehow reminded me of you. I left the room. Poured gasoline on the floor. On the carpet. On the stairs. Outside it was cold. Dark. The only thing visible was a small light in my hand. A single match. The match fell. And I hoped it to take away my memories of you.

It kills me not to know this but I've all but just forgotten
What the color of her eyes were and her scars or how she got them

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